Because I Know too Much…

~WARNING~ This poem may be depressing to some, but these are my honest words of what my reality of living with my severe bipolar 1 disorder with mixed episodes and rapid cycling and PTSD is sometimes like.


Because I Know Too Much…

Because I know what Bipolar is, I know what it feels like to want to be dead.

Because I know what it feels like to want to be dead, I know what it feels like to be dead.

Because I know what it feels like to be dead, I know what death is.

Because I know what death is, I know what life is.

Because I know what life is, I know what love is.

Because I know what love is, I know what love feels like.

Because I know what love feels like, I know what it feels like to be alive.

Because I know what it feels like to be alive, I know what living is.

Because I know what living is, I know what dying is.

Because I know what dying is, I know what the ending is.

Because I know what the ending is, I know how it will end.

Because I know how it will end, I know what death is.

Because I know what death is, I know too much.

Because I know too much, I know more than I want to know.

Because I know more than I want to know, I know more than I should know.

Because I know more than I should know, I know bipolar.

Because I know Bipolar, I learned too much.

Because I learned too much,

I know too much.


“I wrote this poem after thoughts rapidly fired inside my mind after watching the remake of the movie “Beaches” on the LMN channel late last night. I love that movie and it is truly a movie about life and death, living and dying.

My thoughts rapidly flew into my mind about how I all ready know too much about life, because I know so much about death. I know what death is because I have been so painfully close to it many times. So, this poem comes from the reality of my rapid thoughts, living with bipolar disorder and from watching the movie ‘Beaches’ late last night. I hope you like my thoughts and poem. It is very deep as my mind and thought processes always think and feel very deeply about life and living”


(Picture was used from the “Deviant Art” Website)

Copyright © By Susan Walz and myloudbipolarwhispers.com – All written content and personal artwork is © myloudbipolarwhispers.com and Susan Walz. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author/owner/artist is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to My Loud Bipolar Whispers and/or Susan Walz with appropriate and specific directions to the original content.

 

 

 

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2 comments

    • Thank you for the comment… honestly “know” is a synonym for “understand…. to know is to have the understanding of…. I believe they are interchangeable words in meaning. If I understand the meaning behind something I know what it is… to know is to understand. Plus I wrote this as a poem and I was feeling it at that very moment in time. I wrote it as I felt it..felt it… I wrote it… plus in a poem words are chosen for their sound and the power and feeling they convey to the writer and the reader. Thank you very much for reading my post and for your thoughts and comment. I appreciate it. I love to have dialogue with other bloggers. Thank you. Sue

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