The above picture is of my daughter Alexia and I…
The Struggle is part of the Story…
- I was born in St. Paul, MN and moved to Lakeville, MN when I was ten years old. Lakeville is a suburb about thirty minutes south of Minneapolis. I will always love the Minneapolis area, I miss it and hope to be able to move back there someday soon. Plus, I love football and I am a forever true die-hard Minnesota Vikings fan and always will be. Go Vikings! Skol!!
- I am a very creative person and have been blessed with the gift and ability to draw and paint. My specialty is mostly realism as that works well with my perfectionism. If you give me a picture of any kind, I can draw and/or paint it to look like that picture or scene. I have tried to branch off and create abstract work as well. However, my perfectionism makes abstract work a bit difficult for me, but I continue to try and have sold some of my abstract work. I have sold some artwork, so I guess that makes me a professional artist… hahaha. The media and techniques I use most often for my drawings and paintings are graphite pencils, water-color pencils, pastels, acrylic paints, water color paints and water color paints and pencils with ink using pointillism etc. to add fine details. I love to draw and paint, do crafts of all kinds, sew, crochet, cook, write and create anything I can as often as I have time for and the money for.
- If you would like to see more of my artwork, crafts and sewing and would be interested in buying any of my work and/or have a picture or idea you would like me to draw and/or paint for you, please contact me in the contact area of my blog. Thank you.
- I attended college at Minnesota State University in Mankato, MN. and graduated with honors with a Bachelor of Science Degree in elementary education and a minor in special education.
- I taught special education for over ten years until the severity of my bipolar 1 disorder symptoms became too severe for to teach anymore. I loved teaching special education and used to say I got paid to give love because essentially that was what I did. God blessed me with a great big caring compassionate heart. I love helping people and it has always been my passion to help others in some capacity. That is who I am.
- I have been very blessed to have three (actually now five) of the most amazing, fabulous and beautiful children in the world. They are and will always be my greatest blessings and treasures in my life. They have saved my life many times and continue to save my life every day. I wouldn’t be alive today if it wasn’t for my children. I tried to always be the best mom I could be, raising my children by praising them as often as I could and my love radiating and pouring out from my heart and soul at all times. I am very proud of all three of my children for everything they have done, continue to do and who they are as people. I am so blessed. My oldest daughter, Kylie, is 25 and is married to my son-in-law Dennis that I love very much, as well. My son, Keagan, is 23 and just got married to my new daughter-in-law Brooke that I also love very much. My youngest daughter, Alexia, is 17 and still lives at home with me. She is a senior in High School this year. I am a single mom, but I have enjoyed that most of the time because I got to raise and love my children just the way I wanted to.
- I have attempted suicide numerous times, engaged in self-injurious behaviors, have had numerous stays in the psychiatric hospital, stayed in half-way houses a few times when I was first diagnosed, had over 100 ECTs (Electro-convulsive Therapy treatments), have been homeless for over three months and then I chose to fight to survive, live and thrive.
- I still live with and have to fight and cope with my daily symptoms of bipolar 1 disorder, PTSD, generalized anxiety disorder and personality disorder. Also, the nature of the beast of this illness still comes back to haunt me until I hit rock bottom again and I truly have to fight to live. My depression can become so very dark and dangerous that I have to fight severe suicidal ideations and constant suicidal thoughts. Somehow I continue to fight to survive and live. I make it out of the darkness until a spark of light ignites and the sun starts shining again, and I feel alive again.
- God has saved my life many times. He has always been with me and by my side whether I knew it or felt his presence or not. I know now that he has been with me throughout my entire journey and all of the many struggles and obstacles I faced and had to overcome, holding my hand and catching all my tears every step of the way. So many times I felt like my brain was trying to kill me….. but God said NO!
- I continue to fight to live, survive and thrive. God has saved my life and I have become born again. I praise God for my every breath of life and my many blessings he has given me. God is good all the time! Thank you God for my life.
Romans 5:3-5 “we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, character and hope. God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”
Romans 8:18 “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”
- I have given many presentations to share my story, increase awareness and educate about mental illness, reduce the stigma of mental illness and reduce the stigma associated with suicide, prevent suicides and prayerfully inspire others. I have given presentations at a local University, spoken as a certified NAMI presenter and spoke to police officers and social workers for their Crisis Intervention Training. I have also been interviewed by our local newspaper and news station to share my story. I want to be a voice for the many people who cannot speak for themselves.
- I want to speak and give more presentations and will give presentations at your requests. Please let me know if you are interested in having me give a presentation for you. Please complete my contact page. Thank you very much.
- I have written and published a book titled “My Bipolar Memoir of Poetry and Hope” You can order the book on http://www.lulu.com, http://www.amazon.com and http://www.barnesandnoble.com. You can order my book in print form or as an e-book.
- I started a YouTube channel titled “What it’s Like to Live With Bipolar 1 Disorder”
about bipolar, suicidal depression, stigma and mental illness. You can check out my channel. This is a work in progress, as I am quite an amateur but I am trying to learn to get better as I go. Here is the link to my channel… https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50gjwENT6tIiiLhvrWfpow?view_as=subscriber
- Lastly, I am in the process of writing another book, my memoir. It is in story form instead of poetry and short stories like my other book. My story will also include some journal entries I have saved for over 25 years. It is impossible, truly, to write exactly the way you are feeling during your darkest hours after your light is shining brightly again. I pray my book will turn out great and will inspire and help others in many important and beneficial ways. I will let you know when my new book (memoir) is finished, what the title is and how you can order it and/or buy it as soon as it is finished.
I pray you will enjoy my blog and I will be able to help you and inspire you in many ways. Please make comments and ask questions as often as you would like. I look forward to hearing from all of you.
Have a fabulous, happy and healthy day today and everyday.
May your blessings overflow today and everyday forever and always.
Love, hugs and blessings, Sue